Blissful Torment

So Hi, I am Justin, and this is my review of the variety pack of magical transformation condoms. I bought them from a weird shop, and was promised they are great fun. I am not sure I fully agree with that. These condoms were fucking difficult. Literally.

First I tried putting one on in the privacy of my home. I started with the black one, assuming that a standard condom color wouldn't do too much. I unpacked it, wrapped it over my member, and poof, my dick got fat, hard and long. And black.

Of course, I thought to myself. Of course it's the BBC-condom. The BBCC. What else did I expect. What a dumb clichee.

So I pulled it off again, and poof, everything was back to normal. I tried putting it back on, but no luck, it did not seem to work twice. Damn, wasted one, I admitted to myself, I will have to be more careful. 7/10? I couldn't really use it, but it looked great.

After thinking it through, I decided to only use them after becoming intimate. Ideally with a hook-up. Luckily I followed rules 1 and 2 of Tinder, and finding hook-ups wasn't terribly hard. Not easy, mind you, but easy enough. Swiping right a few dozen times, writing dumb name-puns a dozen times, and I'd usually have a date set up for the weekend.

With the first girl, a dark-skinned beauty nearly two inches taller than myself, I put on the brown condom, and was quite a bit surprised when my dick turned into what I could only imagine was a horse-cock (still wrapped up of course). Flat-nosed, weirdly shaped, and ... well ... enormous. Not quite as big as what's on a horse, but still gigantic. Luckily for me she did not see it before I was pushing into her (with difficulty), and while she moaned in discomfort, she soon got used to it, and I had a great fuck, until I came ... well ... a lot. I was very glad I was still wearing the condom, and it caught the litre or so without problems. As soon as I had pulled it off, my dick shrank back to normalcy. All good. 6/10 - Big dick is good dick, though this might a bit too much.

The second one was a redhead, so I used the red condom. My dick hardly changed, but I felt my body swell and shift. A look down my stomach showed me perfect abs, perfect toned legs, muscles all over my body. I wished I had a mirror because I was sure I looked like a Greek god. I briefly considered never taking the condom off again, but alas, when she saw me after being fucked doggy-style (I suggested it before putting it on, making it easier for me to hide what was going on), she was enraptured by my appearance, and wanted to suck me off in the raw. Before I could stop her, she had pulled the rubber off herself, and her horrified face when I turned back made me grab my clothes and run straight out of her apartment. 7/10 - Funny, and possibly nice, but the situation was just impractical.

Third one (orange) was even worse. All was fine (my dick looked a bit weird), until I came. And my dick knotted up inside her. I have never been so embarrassed as when we were stuck together for half an hour, with every of her movements making me squeal in pain. 1/10 - Traumatizing. Poor dogs.

It took me a few weeks before I found the courage to try again. But eventually I did. Surely they would not all be bad? It was a mixed bag, or box, in this case.

A light blue one gave me infinite stamina. I fucked my date for three hours, then her roommate for two, and then my date again. I fucked and fucked and fucked, never getting sore or soft. The lack of orgasm did not even bother me, it just felt amazing. I made them both cum many times, and just felt like the biggest stud on the planet. 10/10 - What a night.

The purple one was ... interesting. Similar to the one before, I could fuck for hours. Unlike the one before, I wanted to have an orgasm after two minutes. But could not. Not for the life of me. Only in the early morning, after nearly going insane, I exploded so hard I did pass out. 6/10 - torture, but great, but torture, but great. I have very mixed feelings about this one.

The dotted one was fun. It did not do anything to me, but the second I entered that cute Asian's pussy, she nearly screamed. Not from pain, from pleasure. She had cum in one single stroke. So I kept going, until she passed out. Would have loved to have more girls present, but alas, that did not work out. 9/10 - I'd buy this one again.

The green one ... Well let's just say that if you read something about a Hulk-like person smashing up an apartment in LA and never be seen again... Pretend it wasn't me. 5/10 - was nice to blow off some steam.

Can't say I liked the white one much. Micropenis really wasn't much good for anything, so I just used another one. 3/10 - What a waste.

Three different shades of purple/lavender/violet resulted in my cock changing shape in fun ways: More bumpy, more veiny, bigger head, longer, shorter, they just felt like random assortments of minor changes. 6/10 - good variety, but not very special.

Until finally, the pink one. I thought I'd keep a standard color for last, to end on a bang. You know what's normal? I thought. Pink condoms! Super common! Nothing special about them!

You know what's also typical pink? Girly stuff.

Imagine my surprise when I poofed into a girl's body, utterly flabbergasted. My date didn't mind, and it was an amazing night, a great morning after, a good breakfast, and only on Monday morning I realized that (of course) I did not have a cock any more. How do you take off a condom that's on a dick you don't have? You don't.

Guess I'll go by Justine now.

Copyright 2019-05-09 Blissful Torment