Blissful Torment

Dear Mistress,

It saddened me greatly when you wrote that we would be out of touch for a while, what with you having a family event and not wanting to risk anyone catching you. Thank you for leaving me a list of orders. It sweetened my time alone.

I have been diligently edging myself every day. You know I love it, and hate it, and love to hate it. It's now been five days, and I am about to climb the walls. When I read of other people (usually women) who can edge daily for weeks or months, it fills me with pure jealousy.

Finally, yesterday evening, you allowed me more than just some edges. The thought of what was to come already put me on edge. I undressed, showered, and climbed into bed. Sleeping completely naked had taken some time to get used to it, but now I like it. It's a bit impractical sometimes with a hard cock leaking precum everywhere, but that just makes me change the sheets more often, which is good. You know how living alone turns people into slobs.

I put a hand on my cock, feeling its hardness. Safe to say you could have mounted me without difficulty, no further teasing needed. I wished you did. A week of denial seemed like forever.

But before I touched myself properly, one last task. "Watch a ruined orgasm compilation." I used my phone to check out Pornhub, and somewhat to my surprise it was not hard to find at all. Dozens of choices, even. I picked one with a good thumbnail of a hot girl.

While I watched one cock after the other ooze out their white load, often with a man moaning, always with a sexy woman stroking or sucking it, I got more and more turned on. I did not touch myself, as you had ordered. I really wanted to, but I am glad you forbade it, as I probably could not have held back any more.

I wish you had been there - following someone's orders while they are present is so much more intoxicating than doing it by oneself. No such luck for me. Still, I grabbed the vibe, intrigued to find out if I actually could ruin with it, something I had never really tried.

Vibrators are tricky for men, as I have undoubtedly told you before. Too much buzzing, not enough stroking. I had brought a thick towel with me, and a smaller one. I wrapped the small one around my cock, to deal with the aftermath in case of success. It took me a few tries to find a comfortable position. I used the larger one folded over multiple times, and placed it between my erection and my stomach. I pushed the vibe between the folds, against the upper side of my cock. 

The dampened vibrations left me with a nice rumble from the powerful wand. It felt very good. Not quite as great as it seems to be for you when you get yourself off while you make me watch, but still amazing, especially since I didn't have to lift a finger.

When I got close, I turned the vibe off. Two or three times, getting hornier and hornier. Turning it back on made me twitch every time. Only being able to choose between ON and OFF was thrilling,  it took control over the precise sensation away from me. If I closed my eyes and put my hands over my head, I could imagine you wielding the vibe, standing over me, smiling, smirking, enjoying the view.

I fantasized about being tied up, you telling me that I was not allowed to have an orgasm, and me struggling to hold back (which I was, at this point). I felt the edge hit me, so after holding my breath for a second, I turned the vibe off, and my cock pumped out just a trickle of cum. I knew I wasn't done. This was just a very leaky edge, not a real ruin. So I turned it on again. This is always the best part; pleasure just after a leaky edge is amazing. After a few seconds I knew I'd be going over, and I switched it off again. Seconds passed, me just lying there in silence, breathing heavily, my mind focused on the sensation of my cock clenching and throbbing. I thought about what was going to happen, how I'd ruin my orgasm after a week of edging, just because you told me to, and with a groan, it started. I felt the cum ooze out. First a harder spurt, then a long, slow dribble, drenching the towel, running down my cock hot and sticky.

After a couple tired breaths, I felt sober again. I went to clean up in the bathroom, wondering if I should take a picture of the mess for you as proof, but you had not asked for it, so I did not. If you wanted one, you could always make me do it again.

That thought was enough to make me hard again, and I had barely finished peeing. Fuck.

I woke up during the night three times, erect every time. I'm still/again hard as I type this letter to you. It is awful, and great. 

Thank you, Mistress.

Your devoted slut

Blissful Torment 2020-09-25